On Marrying

The one Question which seems to be untiring about me is “Why are you not married?” While I have no answer about this, a few thoughts on it do surface.
Initially when the marriage “season” originated in my life, it was an egoistic thought of meeting the one who will be able to take care of my insanity. When immature wisdom dawned a little later, the thought changed to “Will I be able to take care of her?” But still immature, since it was devoid of the understanding that real care can be possible only when we observe religiously the laws of emotions, unselfishness, and of giving. Do we know or even feel the need to know what it takes to keep our life partner ever happy, cheerful, secure, and loving? Can we be unselfish enough to honour the commitments we make in our wedding vows?  Ofcourse, most of us do not even know what we are committing in the marriage ceremony. If we knew, then the question of divorce and disrespect cannot arise. But alas, we choose our partner using criteria which are fit to shop for a puppy – she should be cute, patient, loving, never feel bad when I do everything to make her do so. Your loving puppy dog will fulfil these demands fully. We do all this wooing only in the initial period lasting max upto honeymoon. Most marriages end emotionally with the honeymoon. We refuse to acknowledge that our so-called love is only self-love. Our giving of love is also an investment demanding high returns. Why ban child marriage when most of them are anyways childish. And then, these 2 “children” get their children. How many couples even remotely feel the need to learn child psychology before they conceive their child? No wonder every child takes birth crying. We only thrust our ignorance onto them while “grooming” them. And we don’t rest in peace till we have made them just like us (exceptions apart) – stupid, selfish, stressed. In my case, I seem to have been spared since whenever “she” said yes, I got cold feet. And when I said “yes,” she saw through my childishness and withdrew gradually. And when “he” and “she” both said “yes,” the world said “no.” Lastly, our Gujju wedding has a “Hasta – Milap” Ceremony (joining of the hands), “Hriday – Milap” Ceremony remains a far cry.